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40 Funny Morning Quotes That Will Kickstart Your Day With a Smile

40 Funny Morning Quotes That Will Kickstart Your Day With a Smile

Are you a morning person? If so, then you’ll probably love these funny morning quotes. Yep. These quotes are about mornings, good mornings, and the people that think a morning can be good need to keep their spirits high because we all know mornings disappoint fairly quickly. But that’s not all! These funny morning quotes are also for those night owls, the sleep-till-3pm-and-still-need-boatloads-of-caffeine-people, the “but first, coffee” lads. So without further ado, here are some of our favorite morning quotes.

The Best Funny Morning Quotes

1.”So far as I know, anything worth hearing is not usually uttered at seven o’clock in the morning; and if it is, it will generally be repeated at a more reasonable hour for a larger and more wakeful audience.” — Moss Hart
2.”My routine is to ride that snooze button as far as it will take me, take a quick shower, get dressed in the dark and bolt out the door.” — Willie Geist
3.”I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up.” — Benjamin Franklin
4.”I’m sorry for people who don’t drink. They wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day.” — Frank Sinatra
5.”I yawned and stretched luxuriously in the morning. I make noises when I stretch because it feels ten times better than stretching silently.” — Kevin Hearne
6.”Some mornings I just feel like breaking the damn alarm, but then one thing always stops me. I paid hundreds of dollars to buy my phone.” — Job Might
7.”I have always disliked the morning, it is too responsible a time, with the daylight demanding that it be ‘faced’ and (usually when I wake for I wake late) with the sun already up and in charge of the world, with little hope of anyone usurping or challenging its authority. A shot of light in the face of a poor waking human being and another slave limbs wounded into the light-occupied territory.” — Janet Frame

Child hitting adult with a pillow

8.”What irritates me most of all about these morning people is their horribly good temper, as if they have been up for three hours and already conquered France.” — Timur Vermes
9.”Every single day I wake up and make up my mind that I am going to work really hard. Then my mind laughs at me and says “Good joke”. Then we laugh for some more time and I go back to bed.” — Gehenna Toss
10.”Twinkle twinkle sleepy star, wake up now it’s the 11th hour, up above the world so high, the sun has risen in the sky.” — Mickey Nice
11.”Morning is an important time of day because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have.” — Lemony Snicket
12.”Eat a live frog first thing in the morning, and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.” — Mark Twain
13.”The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.” — Robert Frost
14.”Morning is wonderful. Its only drawback is that it comes at such an inconvenient time of day.” —Glen Cook
15.”If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love. Don’t be surly at home, then go out in the street and start grinning “Good morning” at total strangers.” — Maya Angelou
16.”Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?” — J.R.R. Tolkien
17.”Sometimes you climb out of bed in the morning, and you think, I’m not going to make it, but you laugh inside – remembering all the times you’ve felt that way.” — Charles Bukowski
18.”Birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don’t speak bird.” — Kurt Cobain
19.”When you wake up in the morning, Pooh,” said Piglet at last, “what’s the first thing you say to yourself?” “What’s for breakfast?” said Pooh. “What do you say, Piglet?” “I say, I wonder what’s going to happen exciting today?” said Piglet. Pooh nodded thoughtfully. “It’s the same thing,” he said. — A. A. Milne

Two persons laughing while looking at each other

20.”If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy. If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.”— E.B. White
21.”There are two ways of waking up in the morning. One is to say, ‘Good morning, God,’ and the other is to say, ‘Good God, morning’!” — Fulton J. Sheen
22.”Afternoons are hard. Mornings are pure evil from the pits of hell, which is why I don’t do them anymore.” — Rachel Caine
23.”Every morning, I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.” —Robert Orben
24.”If it’s your job to eat a frog, it’s best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it’s your job to eat two frogs, it’s best to eat the biggest one first.” —Mark Twain
25.”Every morning is a battle between the superego and the id, and I am a mere foot soldier with mud and a snooze button on her shield.” — Catherynne M. Valente
26.”Every morning brings new potential, but if you dwell on the misfortunes of the day before, you tend to overlook tremendous opportunities.” — Harvey Mackay
27.”It is a good morning exercise for a research scientist to discard a pet hypothesis every day before breakfast. It keeps him young.” — Konrad Lorenz
28.”Good morning, this is God. I will be handling all of your problems today. I will not need your help, so have a miraculous day.” — Wayne Dyer
29.”Next week, or next month, or next year, I’ll kill myself. But I might as well last out my month’s rent which has been paid up, and my credit for breakfast in the morning.” — Jean Rhys
30.”I like freedom. I wake up in the morning and say, ‘I don’t know, should I have a popsicle or a donut?’ You know. Who knows.” — Oscar Nunez
31.”If you get up in the morning and think the future is going to be better, it is a bright day. Otherwise, it is not.” — Elon Musk
32.”It sounds plausible enough tonight, but wait until tomorrow. Wait for the common sense of the morning.” — H.G. Wells
33.”I live a fast life / Funny thing is she wasn’t saying that last night / I can’t believe what we did last night / I’m gonna wake up in the morning sun / Rollover, telling everyone / I can’t believe what we did last night.” — Edwin Z. Perez
34.”Good Morning Sunshine; thank you for filtering / stringently through my dingily dilapidate window/embedding optimistic rays of hope in my life.” — Nikhil Parekh
35.”A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between, he does what he wants to do.” — Bob Dylan
36.”I love the early hours of the day. It’s a nice place to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live there.” — James Lileks
37.”Some people wake up drowsy. Some people wake up energized. I wake up dead.” — James Marsden
38.”I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning, I will be sober, and you will still be ugly.” — Winston Churchill
39.”Everyone wants me to be a morning person. I could be one, only if morning began after noon.” — Tony Smite
40.”Progress isn’t made by early risers. It’s made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.” — Robert Heinlein

Two persons laughing while making breakfast

Funny Good Morning Quotes & Images

Grab some coffee and get a load of these funny good morning quotes. You’ll get the impression that there’s no such thing as a morning person, no matter how smart or successful you are.

Summary

So there you have it, folks! We hope these funny morning quotes make your mornings a tad bit brighter, and if they don’t, watch this space! We will post several interesting quotes from different personalities to keep you entertained. At the end of it all, remember to start your day with a smile. Regardless of how hard it is, we can guarantee that there’s one person in the world who has it harder than you!

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